What a salesman, huh?! At least he’s being honest. Makes me wonder if I should start introducing myself as a semi-narcissistic, OCD, workaholic with a tendency to place expiration dates on relationships within the first two weeks… but I feel like that isn’t as catchy as his pitch. Let’s try some other ones, shall we?:
“Hi, I have Daddy issues. Nice to meet you!”
“Hi, I’m just coming out of a manic-depressive phase and feel like settling down with someone. Nice to meet you!”
“Hi, I’m unemployed and living in my Mom’s basement… with her dead cat. Nice to meet you!”
“Hi, I’ve never satisfied a woman. Nice to meet you!”
And btw, we need to acknowledge the other glaring issue within his message… absolutely NO punctuation whatsoever. That is quite a talent! I wonder if he speaks in run-ons in person? Could make for a very special worst date.